


An angel crying

by melodrame



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Artist! Jeno, Childhood Friends, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, I just wanted something cute don't come at me, Love Confessions, M/M, Minor Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-29
Updated: 2020-04-29
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:55:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23916391
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/melodrame/pseuds/melodrame
Summary: From that tiny distance, Renjun realizes how warm Jeno's arms feel around his body, shivering from the raindrops that have begun to seep into his clothes. A rush of adrenaline suddenly attacks him, the closeness between both bodies giving him the amount of confidence he thinks he needs. Far from that perimeter, the angels cry and he smiles, both of them do. A little closer, a little of that ragged breathing and a little desire to kiss the raindrops that rest on the lips of his best friend.
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun/Lee Jeno
Comments: 6
Kudos: 51





	An angel crying

**Author's Note:**

  * For [pearlaqua](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pearlaqua/gifts).



> Hello!!! I've come here with a Noren one shot because I wanted some fluff hehe. 
> 
> I hope you like it!!

Completely skeptical, Renjun turns his gaze to the sky and gently shakes his head, not wanting to accept the possibility of rain during that particular afternoon. That can ruin each and every one of his plans, a pout that glimpses on the tip of his lips, a gesture that, obviously, is perceived by his best friend.

“Renjunnie?” Jeno cocks his head to get a better look at him, one of his hands gently caressing his shoulder and then lowering his caresses along his arm. “What is it?”

“I do not want it to rain.”

Jeno can't help but smile at his best friend's words, Renjun’s voice echoing like a little boy about to perform the tantrum of the century. He silently wonders if his annoyance is due to something in particular, but decides to keep those thoughts away from him. For the moment.

“Don't worry, okay? If it rains, we can have a picnic another day.”

“But it's your birthday, we've always had a picnic on your birthday.” Renjun says, frowning with his gaze, again, at the gray sky.

“It's not like this is the last birthday we’re going to spend together.” Shrugging, Jeno leaves his hand on the other's arm and returns to his previous position, right next to his best friend.

From that distance, he has a complete view of Renjun’s profile, being able to appreciate the beautiful shape of his nose or the way his eyelashes caress the bones of his cheeks every time he blinks. He can also appreciate the movement of his lips when speaking, or the strokes that he draws mentally when counting each mole on his friend’s face. Silently, he wishes his skin was a blank canvas, that it would give him the opportunity to paint on it. After all, Jeno has lived for art and for a couple of months, maybe years, his best friend has become his muse. Secretly, prohibited, but he has done it anyway.

“But I’m not happy with this.” An annoyed Renjun expresses again, crossing both arms over his chest.

Jeno frowns and lets out a small laugh, a sigh that escapes from his lips as he nods his head so the other can start to follow him. By then, the sky is already dark and it doesn't seem to be six in the afternoon. Some people have taken out their umbrellas and others protect themselves with thick, warm clothing. Jeno can hear Renjun cursing under his breath.

“Are you cold?” He asks immediately, starting to unbutton his jacket with the illusion of giving it to the youngest.

“No!” Renjun's refusal is so hasty that they are both stunned for a fraction of a second, forcing the boy to clear his throat. “I mean, it’s not necessary. I also have a jacket, see?” He points to his own clothes, gently nodding with his head.

“But are _you_ cold? That jacket doesn't look very warm and the wind is starting to blow strong.”

“No.”

Jeno lets out a sigh, finally giving up. At this point, he’s used to Renjun not accepting any of his help, so this should come as no surprise to him. But then, why does he feel some sort of disappointment? The grayish atmosphere may have conditioned him a little, the nostalgia taking over him once again, a sad smile that traces a curve on his thin lips.

“You did accept my help once, remember?”

***

A child's cry alerts him enough to stand up from the ground, the mud impregnated in his pants while a yellow raincoat protects him from the thick raindrops falling from the sky. He takes a couple of steps. One, two, three. The little boy is almost in front of him now.

“Are you okay? Did something happen to you?” He asks softly, offering him a smile. “Why are you crying?” The boy is trying to cover his face with his hands, but Jeno can look some teardrops streaming down his face.

The little boy seems sad, the cool breeze in the wind making him shiver under his clothes. And he does not give any answers, but it seems like he is looking for someone. Jeno could see that by the way he frowns, by the way he looks for that special someone in a sea of people trying to protect themselves from the rain that made an appearance out of nowhere.

“Are you lost?”

A nod. _Finally_. An answer that Jeno manages to get from him. It’s not much, it is something.

“Is it okay if I ask you to come with me for a little while? I’m afraid you’re going to get sick if you stay here in the pouring rain.” Offering a hand to him, he hopes not to be rejected, and surprisingly, the boy accepts the help. “Thanks! You won’t regret it.”

A happy Jeno takes the other’s hand into his own, walking together for some time until he finds some sort of refuge under a large tree. Somehow, it manages to protect them from most of the rain. And now, they are both silent for a moment, the black-haired boy quickly realizing that the younger one hasn't stopped shaking.

“Are you cold? Here.” With enough agility for his age, he takes off his yellow raincoat and offers it to him, the other one thanking him with a nod before putting it on his wet clothes. Jeno looks surprised at how easily is to him to accept his help, realizing he must be freezing and perhaps he doesn’t have a choice.

“T-Thank you.” Jeno is amazed when he gets to hear him speak. For a moment, he has thought he wasn’t going to accept, or even talk to him in the first place. Why would him? He doesn’t even know Jeno. At the end of the day, he is nothing but a stranger in the park, who happens to be sharing some clothes with another stranger. A lost boy.

But there’s something Jeno hasn’t noticed until now, because he hasn’t had the time or the chance to actually hear it. His voice. The little boy’s voice.

It's like honey, as sweet as the lullaby her mother sings to him every night before going to sleep. Because even though it’s just one word, it’s just a ‘thank you’, Jeno would’ve done anything to hear it one more time. Does this mean he needs to do something in order for him to say it again?

And he’s about to say something else, since he has a lot of questions. What is he doing there in the first place? Why is he wearing such light clothes? Is there a chance he’s going to get sick? If so, is he going to be okay? Jeno thinks he needs to rest for a bit, to get into his bed and have some warm soup. Maybe he could play some videogames so he doesn’t get too bored, at least that’s what he does when he’s sick and he’s forced to stay in bed for a couple of days.

Where is he from? Does he even live here? Do they go to the same school?

But a feminine voice takes him out of that momentary trance, turning his face to meet a woman. She is calling for the boy, who jumps up and begins stripping off the borrowed raincoat.

“No, no, keep it. You'll keep getting wet if you don't use it.”

“But it is not mine. It's yours.”

Jeno smiles at his voice. Again. But the woman’s voice forces him to act quickly.

“Yes, but I think you need it more. I live in that house, see?” Jeno points with his index finger. “The one on the corner with a small apple tree in the front. I live there, so you can return the raincoat whenever you like. I'm sure I won’t get too wet on my way home if I run fast enough. Don’t worry about me, I’m a fast runner.”

Another cry from the little boy's mother is enough to alert both of the boys once again.

“Fine, fine, fine. B-But I must go now.” Pause. “Thank you very much.” He finally says, turning his head to start walking the other way.

“Wait.” Jeno says, reaching out to grab the other boy’s arm. “I’m Jeno, what is your name?”

“Renjun, my name is Renjun.” And he smiles softly.

They both do.

***

“Why don't you ever bring a raincoat with you if rain was announced for today?”

“Oh? Really? Because I don't see you in a raincoat either.” Renjun responds, defensively.

“What are you going to give me this year?” Then he intervenes, tilting his head slightly to look askance at his friend's expression.

At the question, Renjun freezes in place. From that distance, Jeno can see how his cheeks turn pink, but he cannot assure in any way that it’s from shame or cold. Quietly, he hopes for it to be the first option. Secretly, he’s asking the gods for him to lose his mind. Because he has done it a thousand times, because he’s always blushing around his best friend.

Maybe he has a crush on him.

Maybe Jeno loves Renjun.

“Come on, give me at least one clue. I’m not asking for much.”

It’s like the odds are in Renjun’s favor, because as soon as he parts his lips to give a proper answer (or an excuse?), the rain starts hitting faster than before, Jeno cursing under his breath as he takes Renjun’s hand into his, forcing him to go faster.

“Can’t you run faster?”

Renjun frowns and rolls his eyes in annoyance, following until they reach the park. They don’t have to look at each other before they make their way towards that big tree, Jeno finally resting his back against the trunk while he tries to catch his breath.

“Your hair is wet.”

“No shit, Sherlock.” Renjun run his fingers through the soft locks of his hair, checking on his clothes later in case they’re soaking wet.

“Wait, let me.”

Renjun doesn’t have time to complain before Jeno takes a step closer to him, standing in front of him as he raises one of his hands to gently caress his hair. In complete awe, Renjun frowns once again and even though he parts his lips in order to say something, absolutely nothing comes from them.

“Don’t move.”

“What are you doing?”

“I said don’t move.”

“But you’re just playing with my hair.”

He hasn’t realized that until now. Jeno has been staring at him best friend for some time now, his eyes paying special attention on the facial features that seems to be carved by the angels themselves. And it’s been like that for months, Jeno losing track of time when it comes to Renjun. It’s like, for some particular reason, he simply can’t look away.

“Oh.” Taking a step back, Jeno faces the floor and keeps himself in silence. He hopes Renjun doesn’t notice the soft shade on pink that has taken over his warm cheeks. God, he knows for a fact how ridiculous he probably looks.

But while Jeno looks at his own boats, he also sees a pair of shoes that come closer to him. So, slowly, he looks up. Renjun is in front of him, once again.

“What happened?” He asks.

“What do you mean?” Jeno looks so confused, sparkly eyes coming from his best friend. And he takes another step closer, Jeno taking one back.

“You’re blushing.”

“No, I’m not.”

“Yes, Jeno, you are. I’ve never seen you like this before.”

“So, what?” At this point, his cheeks are basically exploding in pink shades. “You’ve always blushed.”

“What? No, I’ve never done that.”

“You have, plenty of times.”

“Name one.”

Jeno frowns, wondering where is this coming from. It’s not like he could escape from this, not when the pouring rain is just a couple of steps from them and there’s this tree trunk blocking the way.

“You blushed earlier today, don’t you remember? When I asked you about my birthday gift.”

“Fair enough. That’s just one occasion.”

“You asked me that. Just to name one.”

“Name another one.”

“What for?”

“Just do it.”

Jeno thinks he has never been this confused in his whole life, but he makes an effort. He’s always doing this, doing whatever Renjun tells him to do in order to keep him happy. Because seeing him happy also makes him happy. He doesn’t quite know how to put it into words, but it’s just the way it is.

“You even blush when I talk to you, when I look at you.”

Renjun hasn’t said a word, so Jeno keeps going. What for? He’s completely unsure.

“There are some things I’ve been noticing about you, but I don’t know why is this important to you now?” He pauses, tilting his head so Renjun can say something in return. But, again. Silence. “Alright then. Well…”

The black-haired male has started to realize this is harder than expected. Because saying what he has learned from his best friend is going to reveal his undying affection for him, it’s going to accept the fact that having Renjun as his friend has stopped from being strictly platonic a long time ago. And, truth be told, Jeno is just learning to love Renjun, he has been learning to do it for quite some time now. Because he has realized he has never done it before. Loving someone, he means. He doesn’t know the concept, what it truly means. And maybe he doesn’t know it yet, but there’s a part of him telling him he’s finally getting there.

Perhaps that’s why it’s so scary. Perhaps this is why this is such a nightmare. Because he doesn’t know how should he feel about this. About loving someone. About loving a friend. About loving a best friend.

And he feels it, he does feel the nightmare becoming real. It’s in the way his heart beats like the speed of light when Renjun is talking to him, when he gives him the littlest amount of attention. When he talks to him, when he smiles, when he exists.

“It hasn’t been like that since always, though. It’s been gradual, I guess. Perhaps I haven’t been paying that much of attention but, well, you’ve started to blush a lot more recently. Perhaps the last months, the last year? I can’t tell for sure.” Another pause. He needs time, he needs to catch some air. “You blush when you’re nervous, when you talk in front of an audience, when someone asks you something, when Mark hyung scolds you because you’ve done a bad thing. But you also blush when you’re happy, when we go out for dinner and you hate the food because it’s too spicy for you. Sometimes, you even blush so brightly when something excites you that much so you end up clapping like you’re a child. Like when we were younger.” Jeno smiles, softly. “And you smile during sunny days, but also when it’s raining. Like today.”

“Oh, when the angels cry.”

“Yes, when the angels cry.”

***

Renjun and Jeno are eight years old, sitting on an old bench as they wait for the rest of the people to leave the church. Outside, the raindrops are crashing against the glass, one of the boys remaining in silence. For a moment, Jeno does the same.

“How are you feeling?”

No answer.

“It’s okay if you don’t want to talk but, let’s get some air. It’s going to be good for you, alright? Do you trust me, Renjunnie?”

A simple nod from his friend is enough for Jeno to stand up from the bench and take the other’s hand, walking by his side as both of them make their way out of the church.

“It’s cold outside.”

“Here.” Softly, Jeno hugs his best friend from behind, placing his chin on his left shoulder. “Is this better? Do you want me to —”

“No, no, please. Stay. Stay with me.”

“Yes, yes, don’t worry. I’m not going anywhere, I promise.” He speaks in a whisper, his hands gently caressing him over his clothes, his face towards the sky.

“Why is it raining so hard today?”

“It’s the angels. They’re crying, Renjunnie.”

“What?”

“You see, the angels are crying because seeing you sad also makes them sad. But they understand it, you know? Maybe you’re going to feel sad for a while, maybe it’s going to rain for a while as well. But, do you know what happens after a very rainy day?”

“A rainbow?”

“Yes, a rainbow.”

“My mom loved rainbows, she used to say they made her days happier.”

“Do rainbows make you happy as well?”

“Yes, they do. They’re really pretty.” Renjun offers a weak smile, placing his own hands over Jeno’s to caress them softly. “Thank you.”

“That’s okay.”

***

“So, do you like it?”

“Do I like what?”

“Me? Blushing, I mean.”

“Why are you asking me this?” Jeno’s voice is barely audible at this point, his whole body starting to tremble. He doesn’t quite know if it’s because of the nervousness or the coldness from his wet clothes.

“Would you just answer my question?” Renjun knows how to make Jeno do what he likes, his puppy eyes doing most of the work. “Please?”

But it’s not that easy. Just by looking at him, Jeno feels like he’s going to cry. Because he has never looked at Renjun and told him a lie. He has always tried to be as sincere as possible. And now, he’s a complete mess. He’s shaking to the point it alarms Renjun who comes closer to him and put both of his hands on the taller boy’s shoulders.

“What is it, Jeno? Are you okay?” He asks, nothing but worry on his gaze. “Did I do anything wrong? God, I’m so sorry, I didn’t want to say something that could put you in this position.”

“It’s not that.” He says, at the verge of tears. “It’s not because something I could say, it’s because I don’t know how would you react.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I don’t want to lie to you, Renjunnie.”

“Jeno —” His hands lower along his arms, making a way to his friend’s hands. “It’s okay, really. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable. You don’t have to tell me anything, it’s fine. I’m sorry I even asked, I know it’s probably nothing for you and I’m sorry for starting to ask question after question, it’s just I —” But he stops, so does his touching.

“What?”

“I was hoping you would say yes.”

“Say yes?”

“That you would like it when I blush.” Scratching the back of his head, Renjun refuses to look at Jeno right in the eyes.

“But I —”

“That’s okay, though. It’s probably nothing.” The warmest of smiles appears on his lovely, yet somehow sad features, one of his hands brushing gently Jeno’s cheek as he takes a step back from him.

“No, no.” Rapidly, Jeno grabs his hand and pulls him closer once again, but freezing the moment his friend is in front of him. “Don’t go. I like it.”

“You like it?”

“I like it when you blush, it’s c-cute.”

“Just cute?”

“Renjunnie, what do you want me to say?”

“Nothing, I’m just — playing with you.” But his voice doesn’t seem like he’s playing, it seems like he’s been trying to say something yet he doesn’t have to guts to admit it at that particular moment.

“Oh, okay. I just, well, I don’t want this to be awkward.”

“What do you mean? Why would it be awkward?”

“Because I like you.”

Jeno stops. He freezes — he can’t believe what he has just said. In front of him, Renjun looks at him so confused, like he’s at lost of words. And he should be, because he has no idea how’s he going to turn the tables so he can come clean from all of this mess. Something comes to his mind just in time.

“I mean, I like you blu—”

“I like you too, Jeno.” Renjun cries, his lips trembling just like his hands. Jeno has to take them once again so they stop shaking, but it doesn’t seem to work out.

“Renjunnie.”

“Let me finish.” The boy nods and tries his best to keep his gaze on his friend, his heart beating like crazy against his ribcage as his breathing becomes stronger and stronger. “I tried not to, you know? I tried not to like you. I didn’t want to like you. Because liking you means I’m going to lose you. But I just — I just can’t take it anymore. I can’t simply look at you and pretend there’s nothing going on in my head, that I don’t care when you go on dates and I can’t have you.” Renjun feels like his heart is tearing itself apart, not being able to look at Jeno in the eyes. Not anymore. “And perhaps I’m just selfish. Because everyone would love to have you. And I do, in a way. I do have you. You’re my best friend, the only one I have but —”

“B-But you wish I wasn’t just your friend.”

So Renjun finally looks at him, feeling Jeno’s breathing against his skin. And it burns like fire, it feels like he’s a about to die. Out of stress, out of love, out of uncertainty.

“Y-Yes.”

“What are you going to give me for my birthday?”

“W-What?”

“If you’re not going to give me anything, can I be the one giving you something?”

By grabbing the fabric of Renjun’s clothes, Jeno pulls him even closer to him and his lips meet his for the first time ever. His heart finally collapses inside of him, his unsteady breathing doing its best to keep him alive. And his lips. God — Renjun’s lips are everything he would’ve dreamt of. At first is just a caressing, but he starts guiding and the younger one follows, feeling something humid on his face. Is he crying? Worried, he pulls away, looking at the other with confusion in his eyes.

“I’m sorry, are you okay? I didn’t mean to —”

“No, no. J-Jeno.” He cries, the look on his face showing how stressed he has been until that very moment. “These are h-happy tears.” He says softly, looking at the other like he’s the most beautiful being in the whole wide world. “I’ve been wanting to kiss you for the longest time I —”

And it melts Jeno’s heart, pulling his friend closer so he can hug him properly, his arms around his body before he allows himself to hide his face in the space between his neck and shoulder, a soft kiss now pressed to his jawline.

“You can kiss me whenever you want, okay? I won’t say no to you, I promise.”

“You promise?”

“When have I ever broken a promise, huh?”

“Never.” Renjun smiles, leaning in so his nose can brush against Jeno’s. “I’m happy, I’m so happy.”

“Happy birthday to me, I guess.” The taller boy says, pressing a soft kiss against his lips. “So what’s my gift?”

“Stop asking, you’re ruining the mood. You’ll see.”

“Fine.” Jeno finally gives up, rolling his eyes as he looks at his friend, nothing buy joy on his beautiful features. God knows how happy they are, Jeno watching Renjun as he cries a little more, plenty of hugs and kisses are now given by his friend. “What are you thinking about?” Then he asks, noticing Renjun has stopped crying and it’s looking at the sky instead. They’ve moved a little so the pouring rain can finally hit them.

“She would’ve been so proud if I brought you home. She would’ve been so proud of me.”

“I know she would, Renjunnie.”

**Author's Note:**

> Leave a comment if you liked this! And if you didn't, you can also leave something so I can get better next time :-)


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